Professing * Reflecting

Saturday, December 09, 2006

I am like that guy who says he'll call but then he doesn't call but he had really wanted to call but then it was kind of too late to call

But with the blog and the posting. The short of it is, I am depressed again. The long of it is, I am depressed again and I isolate myself when I am depressed (which is why I disappeared during last year's six-month bout) and tend to spend every possible spare minute under several quilts in my bed, drinking tea and watching bad television. (Have you seen E!'s "Love Ride: Brad & Angelina"? I have. Four times.)

The good news is that I am not having it this time. I have found a new shrink. I have seen her twice and am feeling very hopeful about being back in therapy. I am taking care of business both personal and professional, allowing myself to take to my bed only when all (ok, most) of my work is done. The one thing I cannot seem to handle is very much social interaction. I feel like I need to perform happiness or okay-ness or at least some acceptable level of "not batshit crazy." I think the same is true of blogging. But lately during the quilt/E!/tea sessions, I have been feeling a pull toward the laptop and the blog. A good sign, I think.

So, see, aren't you glad that guy never called? Because he would have just told you that he suffers from depression, has agoraphobic tendencies, and indulges in frequent binges of tabloid television. Sexy.



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